Does every old house have a resident gremlin?

Well we certainly do! I'm absolutely positive that is what is to blame for all the things constantly breaking in our 30 year old house. 

I doubt very seriously our gremlin is this cute.

For instance:

Right after Christmas - BAM!!!! The garage door breaks.

Then the next week - BAM!!! The barrel inside the washing machine decides to take on a life of its own.

Next - BAM!!! Our television, begins to turn itself on and off as if it's possessed.

And now...(read in your head with French accent) the piece de resistance ...the icing on the cake...the big momma of breakage...

BAM!!! THE FURNACE!

And it's 20 degrees outside.

Yes, that's right. The invisible gremlin struck again and this time it's personal.

It's no longer about not being able to use the garage entrance.
It's no longer about not being able to have clean underwear in a drawer.
It's no longer about watching your favorite HGTV show and the screen suddenly goes black.

This is probably what our invisible gremlin looks like controlling our TV.

It's about surviving in a house with just the heat from the fireplace. And I gotta tell ya, this gremlin better be careful, because if I ever catch the little son-of-a (well, you know) I'm going to feed him to the dog next door.

He seems to know EXACTLY when there is a little bit of extra money in the savings account and BAM!!! He strikes again.

Sigh... 
Maybe I should check and see if gremlins are covered under our pest control contract. Damn...

Muffin top = a good thing?

Most women detest having a muffin top. I don't mean the sweet kind. I'm talking about the one you have when your jeans are too tight.
However, this post is NOT about weight or body image issues, although I could probably write a book about THAT. It's actually about finding a fabulous recipe for muffins and sharing it. If you have been reading this blog you know I love to renovate. What you may not know is I also love to cook. 

It would make an awesome B & B!

Like my love of cooking, unbeknownst to many is my secret fantasy about owning a Bed and Breakfast. Yes, I know. Most women my age fantasize about having their way with George Clooney. But hey - he's got that gorgeous, skinny, civil  rights lawyer as a wife now, so I'm bowing out of that particular fantasy. The Thomasville house (see archived posts) was screaming BED AND BREAKFAST to me the whole time we toured through it. In actuality, we are not any more closer to owning that piping hot mess of a house than we were in August. But, every once and awhile when I  try a new recipe I say to Phil, "That's one for the Bed and Breakfast!" I found  one recently and it was so unbelievably good I had to share it with you.

These mouth-watering blueberry muffins are scrumptious and easy to make. Give it a try. It would definitely make the cut for my Bed and Breakfast menu. And... you will love THESE muffin tops!

'/'

INCREDIBLE BLUEBERRY MUFFINS - Makes 12 muffins

      1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

3/4 cup white sugar

1/2 teaspoon salt

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/3 cup vegetable oil

1 egg

1/3 or so cup milk

1 cup fresh blueberries (I used more)

1/2 cup white sugar

1/3 cup all-purpose flour

1/4 cup butter, cubed

1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C). Grease muffin cups or line with muffin liners (I sprayed top of pan with Pam too).
2. Combine 1 1/2 cups flour, 3/4 cup sugar, salt and baking powder. Place vegetable oil into a 1 cup measuring cup; add the egg and enough milk to fill the cup. Mix this with flour mixture. Fold in blueberries. Fill muffin cups right to the top, and sprinkle with crumb topping mixture.
3. To Make Crumb Topping: Mix together 1/2 cup sugar, 1/3 cup flour, 1/4 cup butter, and 1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon. Mix with fork until crumbly, and sprinkle over muffins before baking.
4. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes in the preheated oven, or until done. (I baked them for 23 minutes in a regular (not non-stick) muffin pan.

Is a wood burning fireplace worth all the work?

If you ask me that question while I'm reading by the fire and enjoying a glass of wine I would say, "No brainer! Of course!" However, if you ask me while we are moving and stacking multiple cords of wood I would say, "Perhaps a gas insert may be the way to go."

After receiving help from our son and neighbor, all the wood was split and left in piles on the lawn. HUGE piles.


The next step and obvious question was, "Where the heck are we going to store all this wood?" Leave it to Phil to have an answer.

He said, "I'm going to build a (key word being "a") structure to hold the logs."

Construction phase

"Great!", I thought. We have some room at the edge of our property to hold a bit more wood. That shouldn't cost much. A couple 2 x 4s. Perfect.

But...with Phil one is never enough, therefore he decided to build THREE! Count 'em..THREE! And actually - I must admit he was right. Not only did we need all three of them, but it's STILL not enough storage.

End result:

Unfortunately - 
we still have...

this

and this

and this.

Good news is if there is ever a nuclear disaster, some kind of horrific natural calamity, or another snowmageddon we'll be prepared.

After the remainder of this wood is stacked and stored, the next item on our "to-do" list better be the master bath or a marriage counselor just might be placed on speed dial. Just sayin'.

Art Nouveau?

Perhaps we should just call this yard art and be done with it.

Maybe add a fire...

  
and water feature.

It could work...right?

Is this "The Winter of My Discontent"?

Starting out that way for sure. Let's put it this way... if I ever smell sawdust permeating the air or hear the whrrrrrrr of another chainsaw it will be too soon. AND...just when I was thrilled that we were starting to make some progress and see the forest for the trees (sorry for the pun), we received a neighborly "gift".

I guess the itch to remove troublesome trees is contagious. Our neighbor decided to cut down 3 small trees. I'm sure by now he and the other neighbors think that we are wood hoarders or possibly lumberjack wannabes and therefore covet wood, so he graciously gave us ALL the tree trunks and branches and left them in a pile for us on the side of our yard.  Phil didn't have the heart to tell him we have enough firewood to last us until we croak, so we just dug in and got to work on the NEW pile of wood. This is like the nightmare that never ends.

View from my kitchen window

Even with this setback, we have made some progress in regards to this whole mess. Phil has been working non-stop with the chainsaw and he even let me operate the electric one. That's right - we don't have just one chainsaw - we have FOUR. What? Doesn't everyone??? The question now is where the hell are we going to put all this firewood???
There are...

stacks

of

wood

everywhere

We still have a massive tree to tackle and log splitter to rent.... sigh

Will I EVER get my new master bath started???

Just call me Paul(ette) Bunyan - Lumberjack(jill)

OK... so this picture is a lie. Phil actually does the chainsaw work.
I'm demoted to hauling off the limbs to the woods.

We currently have a yard laden with fallen trees. No - it wasn't from an F5 tornado. We basically did this to ourselves. There were a number of trees and very large limbs that were either dead or a possible threat to our home during a wind or ice storm. Because we are so economical (i.e. cheap) and tree services are so expensive, we paid for the trees and limbs to be dropped, but we have to take care cutting up the wood and removal. May I say that this decision was made by two seemingly rational adults? We're idiots.

Bored? In need of exercise? Want some fresh air? Come on over to our house. Don't forget to bring your chainsaw. And by the way - we have a beer fridge.

Another fine mess we managed to create. So...I have no time for clever repartee for my blog. I'll be back to writing when our yard is
free from bark. Might be a while...

When does a mini-makeover become plastic surgery?

When a renovating retiree is in the picture - that's when. The basement bathroom didn't get a total face-lift, but it was definitely more than a trip to the Clinique or Lancome counter. Possibly more like a nose job-type of reno and almost as painful.

BEFORE = really outdated.
Most of the work was concentrated on this area.

We originally planned to just change the outdated formica vanity top. Sounds easy enough. Then I suggested we get rid of the brass fixtures. OK, not too bad. And while we're at it, let's look for another light fixture - the one in place was the old fashioned "hollywood dressing room" type. Well, if we replace that we may need to replace the outdated mirror. If we remove the mirror (which is glued to the wall), the sheet rock will need to be repaired and repainting the room will be a must. If we paint the walls we need to paint the ceiling. And while I'm at it I might as well paint the trim. Then I thought that the vanity could use an updating with a nice shade of charcoal gray...and this is how a mini-makeover (think - using a new foundation and eyeshadow) turns into a job that costs more, requires more man hours, and a helluva lot more energy (like invasive plastic surgery requiring anesthesia and time to heal).

That is not a blow dryer but a heat gun we used
in hopes of removing the glue from the wall.

As usual there were some bumps and craters in the road. I won't go into the fiasco involving the installation of the lighting fixture. I'm sure this product that was made in China was designed just to piss off Americans that were stupid enough to buy it. 'Nuf said. And re-installing the toilet tank and the new plumbing for the sink gave us a better appreciation of plumbers that can do it quickly and only one time (yes - why do things once when you can do it multiple times?) without having leaks. It took us over a week to complete this project and once again I'd like to throw a wrench at the TV when the people in those commercials spritely claim, "Update your bathroom in a weekend!" Idiots.

After
 My daughter's artwork was a perfect compliment to the more contemporary design.

Not too bad for under $400.

Budget was $300 however, we went over - shocker. We were able to use a faucet we originally had in the upstairs bath along with hooks, hinges and cabinet pulls that were stored in the attic. I had some paint in the garage leftover from painting the living areas that I could utilize. We kept the same shelf which my dad hung over 25 years ago, and just spruced it up with some white spray paint, which we always keep on hand. All of the items that we were able to reuse helped keep the costs* in line which resulted in me naming this room the "mish-mosh bathroom". Part new - part leftover stuff. Hopefully you'll agree that it came together fairly well and didn't completely break the bank.

Vanity top $140 
Mirror $64
Light Fixture $72
Toilet paper holder $10
Vanity paint $15
Ceiling paint $27
Misc. painting and plumbing supplies $30
Total:   $358
$58 over budget

*All costs from Lowes include Phil's 10% veterans discount; however it does not include the gas consumed for the many trips back and forth to Lowes to get the right plumbing parts.

This is just a warm up leading to the Big Kahuna of renovation- THE MASTER BATH. Stay tuned...