Monday, January 11, 2016

Is a wood burning fireplace worth all the work?


If you ask me that question while I'm reading by the fire and enjoying a glass of wine I would say, "No brainer! Of course!" However, if you ask me while we are moving and stacking multiple cords of wood I would say, "Perhaps a gas insert may be the way to go."

After receiving help from our son and neighbor, all the wood was split and left in piles on the lawn. HUGE piles.


The next step and obvious question was, "Where the heck are we going to store all this wood?" Leave it to Phil to have an answer.

He said, "I'm going to build a (key word being "a") structure to hold the logs."


Construction phase
"Great!", I thought. We have some room at the edge of our property to hold a bit more wood. That shouldn't cost much. A couple 2 x 4s. Perfect.

But...with Phil one is never enough, therefore he decided to build THREE! Count 'em..THREE! And actually - I must admit he was right. Not only did we need all three of them, but it's STILL not enough storage.

End result:



Unfortunately - 
we still have...
this












and this
and this.











Good news is if there is ever a nuclear disaster, some kind of horrific natural calamity, or another snowmageddon we'll be prepared.

After the remainder of this wood is stacked and stored, the next item on our "to-do" list better be the master bath or a marriage counselor just might be placed on speed dial. Just sayin'.

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Art Nouveau?



Perhaps we should just call this yard art and be done with it.


Maybe add a fire...
  
and water feature.



It could work...right?


Sunday, November 29, 2015

Is this "The Winter of My Discontent"?

Starting out that way for sure. Let's put it this way... if I ever smell sawdust permeating the air or hear the whrrrrrrr of another chainsaw it will be too soon. AND...just when I was thrilled that we were starting to make some progress and see the forest for the trees (sorry for the pun), we received a neighborly "gift".

I guess the itch to remove troublesome trees is contagious. Our neighbor decided to cut down 3 small trees. I'm sure by now he and the other neighbors think that we are wood hoarders or possibly lumberjack wannabes and therefore covet wood, so he graciously gave us ALL the tree trunks and branches and left them in a pile for us on the side of our yard.  Phil didn't have the heart to tell him we have enough firewood to last us until we croak, so we just dug in and got to work on the NEW pile of wood. This is like the nightmare that never ends.
View from my kitchen window
Even with this setback, we have made some progress in regards to this whole mess. Phil has been working non-stop with the chainsaw and he even let me operate the electric one. That's right - we don't have just one chainsaw - we have FOUR. What? Doesn't everyone??? The question now is where the hell are we going to put all this firewood???
There are...
stacks

of

wood

everywhere
We still have a massive tree to tackle and log splitter to rent.... sigh
Will I EVER get my new master bath started???



Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Just call me Paul(ette) Bunyan - Lumberjack(jill)

OK... so this picture is a lie. Phil actually does the chainsaw work.
I'm demoted to hauling off the limbs to the woods.
We currently have a yard laden with fallen trees. No - it wasn't from an F5 tornado. We basically did this to ourselves. There were a number of trees and very large limbs that were either dead or a possible threat to our home during a wind or ice storm. Because we are so economical (i.e. cheap) and tree services are so expensive, we paid for the trees and limbs to be dropped, but we have to take care cutting up the wood and removal. May I say that this decision was made by two seemingly rational adults? We're idiots.

Bored? In need of exercise? Want some fresh air? Come on over to our house. Don't forget to bring your chainsaw. And by the way - we have a beer fridge.





Another fine mess we managed to create. So...I have no time for clever repartee for my blog. I'll be back to writing when our yard is
free from bark. Might be a while...

Monday, October 19, 2015

When does a mini-makeover become plastic surgery?

When a renovating retiree is in the picture - that's when. The basement bathroom didn't get a total face-lift, but it was definitely more than a trip to the Clinique or Lancome counter. Possibly more like a nose job-type of reno and almost as painful.
BEFORE = really outdated.
Most of the work was concentrated on this area.

We originally planned to just change the outdated formica vanity top. Sounds easy enough. Then I suggested we get rid of the brass fixtures. OK, not too bad. And while we're at it, let's look for another light fixture - the one in place was the old fashioned "hollywood dressing room" type. Well, if we replace that we may need to replace the outdated mirror. If we remove the mirror (which is glued to the wall), the sheet rock will need to be repaired and repainting the room will be a must. If we paint the walls we need to paint the ceiling. And while I'm at it I might as well paint the trim. Then I thought that the vanity could use an updating with a nice shade of charcoal gray...and this is how a mini-makeover (think - using a new foundation and eyeshadow) turns into a job that costs more, requires more man hours, and a helluva lot more energy (like invasive plastic surgery requiring anesthesia and time to heal).
That is not a blow dryer but a heat gun we used
in hopes of removing the glue from the wall.

As usual there were some bumps and craters in the road. I won't go into the fiasco involving the installation of the lighting fixture. I'm sure this product that was made in China was designed just to piss off Americans that were stupid enough to buy it. 'Nuf said. And re-installing the toilet tank and the new plumbing for the sink gave us a better appreciation of plumbers that can do it quickly and only one time (yes - why do things once when you can do it multiple times?) without having leaks. It took us over a week to complete this project and once again I'd like to throw a wrench at the TV when the people in those commercials spritely claim, "Update your bathroom in a weekend!" Idiots.
After
 My daughter's artwork was a perfect compliment to the more contemporary design.



Not too bad for under $400.
Budget was $300 however, we went over - shocker. We were able to use a faucet we originally had in the upstairs bath along with hooks, hinges and cabinet pulls that were stored in the attic. I had some paint in the garage leftover from painting the living areas that I could utilize. We kept the same shelf which my dad hung over 25 years ago, and just spruced it up with some white spray paint, which we always keep on hand. All of the items that we were able to reuse helped keep the costs* in line which resulted in me naming this room the "mish-mosh bathroom". Part new - part leftover stuff. Hopefully you'll agree that it came together fairly well and didn't completely break the bank.

Vanity top $140 
Mirror $64
Light Fixture $72
Toilet paper holder $10
Vanity paint $15
Ceiling paint $27
Misc. painting and plumbing supplies $30
Total:   $358
$58 over budget

*All costs from Lowes include Phil's 10% veterans discount; however it does not include the gas consumed for the many trips back and forth to Lowes to get the right plumbing parts.


This is just a warm up leading to the Big Kahuna of renovation- THE MASTER BATH. Stay tuned... 

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Alright, which one of you hog-tied the substitute?


I thought this excerpt from "Caught in the Middle" would be appropriate at this time since I have decided , in retirement, to substitute teach a few days a week. Let me clarify that I am choosing to sub in elementary schools NOT middle schools, and if you continue to read this excerpt you will see why...

             * * * *  * * * * *

Alright…which one of you hog-tied the substitute? (aka PARTY TIME)

Thankfully it never got to this extreme, although it’s been close – too close. This book would definitely not be complete without a chapter dedicated to the ever-mistreated, always underpaid, unsung hero - the substitute teacher.


There are a lot of very challenging and difficult jobs in a school. As you read in the first chapter, I have had quite a few. One of the toughest was substitute teacher. When my daughter was in 2nd grade, I decided that it would be a great idea for me to earn some extra money by being a sub. I only substituted at my daughter’s elementary school and spent most of my time subbing for kindergarten teachers. I guess all the snot, pee, poop, and god knows what other germs that these kindergarten teachers endured was just too much for their immune systems. Substitute teaching in an elementary school was never easy, but in a middle school??? That’s a whole other ball game.

Right now, I want you to think back to when you were in school. Go ahead, rewind that clock. Do you remember what your reaction was when you walked into the classroom and you saw a substitute at the teacher’s desk?

In elementary school, you were worried and wondered where your teacher had gone and when he or she was coming back. It just wasn’t the same without your beloved, real teacher. You were sad.

In high school it’s all about getting that diploma and getting into college. Having a substitute was frustrating because you knew the class was going to get behind, and then when the teacher DID get back well, you would be working doubletime. You were annoyed.

In middle school, unless you were a total geek, it was just quite simply – PARTY TIME! You were ecstatic, joyous, and celebratory. Word spread like wildfire and those that would, were already thinking of ways to create disruptions. Not a whole lot has changed. Only now, I think the mischief has been kicked up a notch and drives these poor substitutes to new levels of insanity.


As a middle school administrator I always made sure I knew which classes had a sub so I could be sure to walk through regularly and give the students the stink-eye so they would know if they got into trouble they would be dealing with me.
As I walked through the classroom, I sincerely thanked the sub for his or her time in hopes that he or she would come back again and live to fight another day. Although most of them, at the end of the school day looked not only harried, but shell-shocked.  After the last bell rang, I’m sure they ran like hell out the doors and headed straight to the local Mexican Restaurant for the two-for-one margarita special.

Remember, we are dealing with pubescent kids who truly only care about one thing - what their peers think, which means showing their butt when they have a substitute is part of the package. Not literally thank god – at least I don’t remember dealing with someone that mooned a sub. Maybe my brain has just tried to wipe out that memory. Although I do remember a situation in a Florida middle school regarding a boy mooning the entire girls’ volleyball team, but that’s a whole other story.

If parents could see how their little darling behaves in the classroom when they have a substitute, they would think that someone had absconded with their child’s brain and body.


Parent: Where is my child? What creature has overtaken his mind and body?


Me: The alien known as Hormones (pronounced hor – mone- ees) from the planet Idontgiveashit.

  * * * * * * * * * * * *

Substitute teaching certainly has its ups and downs. But so does renovating. The bedroom closet is repaired and more structurally sound than it ever was. This week we will be working on the mini-bathroom makeover. I'll have before, during and after pictures soon!

Saturday, October 3, 2015

What things go BUMP in the night?

All the clothes in our closet- that's what.

Phil and I had planned on using this weekend to put a more modern touch on the basement bathroom - just a slight makeover to bring it into the 21st century. If you have been following my blog, you know I have been talking about our plans for the master bath renovation for some time. Being the great procrastinators that we are, we found a smaller project to tackle before the one that will surely lead to anxiety overdrive, an empty bank account, and a trip to the marriage counselor. So, we decided to take a less challenging project first - the basement bathroom. We ordered a new vanity top and were ready to go with the plans to spruce up the cave-like space that has not been updated in over 10 years. Then the shisnick hit the fan - or literally - the crap hit the floor.


Wednesday morning at 5AM while slumbering and enjoying the last moments of dreamland, we were awoken with a CRASH! I have to say it scared the bejeezuz out of me. I thought to myself, "Well, that's it. The house was finally crumbling." But thankfully it wasn't the roof falling in. It was the shelving and rack in our closet that holds all the clothes and items (which we probably don't need) that occupy the shelf above where the clothes hang. The drywall pulled away from the studs and it fell like a pine tree in an ice storm. And to me, it was just as loud.


The end result of faulty sheet rock installation 30 years ago.
Phil went to Walmart (better him than me) and bought some clothes racks to temporarily hold all our clothes. It looks like the time we thought we'd be spending on the basement bathroom will be spent repairing sheet rock and fixing the closet. And dammit, I'll probably end up having to paint the inside of the closet, which no one but the future buyers of our house will ever see. Can you tell I'm whining???
The boys' and Annamarie's rooms are completely
filled with shisnick from our closet.


This is not going to be an easy or fun fix.  We do not have large walk in closets that would be easy to work in and around. No - we have the old fashioned narrow closets, which are a pain in the butt. And let's hope we don't have to take the doors off. Getting them back on is about as fun as having oral surgery.


Ready for sheet rock, some mud, and new paint.
I suppose we should look at this as an "opportunity" to get rid of clothes and items we don't wear or need any longer. Simplify and minimize. That's my new motto. Maybe another yard sale is in our future...

Up next! Basement bathroom mini-makeover!